when new people come into my life - i always look at them like well i wonder why God brought you into my life ... i dont do this with everything - just with people and i dont know if thats even normal to do [lol] but i do. so when it comes to meeting new guys - im like well i wonder what his purpose is. is he just gon be another headache or is this actually gonna be a good thing ....
about 3 years ago i was dating someone and we split as a mutual decision but we always remained close and we would have our occasional hook-ups or we would date again for a couple months but we never ended up back together - officially. well not too long ago we started seeing each other again - but this time it just feels different. i feel like - im starting to really feel him like i had years ago when we were together. and we've had convos - when we were just "friends" - and he wants an actual relationship - hes looking to settle and just be with one girl but hes having a hard time finding a genuine girl. so i already know what he wants . but of course - ms. wishy washy over here has no idea what i really want. i find myself thinking about him at random times of the day and i find myself like looking on his facebook to see who hes dealing with - and dont think im crazy cuz i know all of you do that shit lol - but iunno ... like is it because i think i want to be back with him .. or is it because im just comfortable with him so i natually just want to stick to it ..
i know i dont want to be in a committed relationship - i have no time to put into one and i like the way things are going right now - i like going out when i want, i like coming and going as i please, and i like dating different people. but in the back of my mind - im starting to think of him more and more ... its confusing ...
but he was brought into my life for a reason a long time ago - and we've never lost contact for a reason - so maybe this is a sign that this could maybe be the right thing. i just feel like - he wouldnt be here just for the fun of it - and that God brought him in my life for a purpose not just for fun ... i dont even know lol .. maybe im just crazy .... either way ... i cant stop thinking about him ....