im having a hard time these days trying to figure out who my real friends are and quite frankly, if i even have any. its so hard to find good, genuine, REAL people in general let alone find MORE then one. i kind of feel like the friends that i do have - were only friends because of the lifestyle i was living. we were always going out, so we were friends because we go to clubs together or go out with dudes together. but at the end of the day, thats all it was. because now that we dont do that stuff anymore ... ALL my friendships with people have changed. and thats pretty sad. I feel like while i am a very difficult person to be around ALL the time, i still feel like im a genuine person and some people will say that im "mean" or im a "bitch" which is very true ... but im also a very realistic person. i dont beat around the bush, i dont lie, i wont save ur feelings if you need to be told something .. and thats the type of friend i want. i dont want a friend thats only there to go out with or to shop with. i want a friend i can count on for ANYTHING and EVERYTHING. i want a friend that no matter how many days go by without us speaking, that still doesnt effect the relationship that we have.
i feel like just like in todays day and age, its near impossible to marry 1 person forever ... i feel like its near impossible to find a good friend.
and thats very sad . . .